Today's Links--Too Many Links in Too Little Space Edition

• Hey, did you see that Bears-Packers game? Boy was that embarassing, right? I mean wow, I'm just glad I'm not a Bears fan right now (shit, I am a Bears fan).
  
• Hilarious old-time advertisement with Steve Garvey.
• Chief Illiniwek is back! Unfortunately there's not much for him to cheer for this weekend, OSU killed the Illini's bowl hopes. I don't think the basketball team's second win against a team I've never heard of is going to cheer me up either.
  
• An autographed Derrick Rose game jersey is up for auction along with other NBA rookies and stars jerseys. $100-$350 sounds fair for the jersey of the next Chicago Bull great.
• If you've got the time to read, Gilbert Arenas' blog will make you laugh from start to finish. In his latest post, he discusses his stupid Barack tattoo, his feelings about the election and some other crap that no one wants to hear from Gilbert. Very funny.
  
• Apparently the Cubs are in the running for signing Randy Johnson to a 1-year deal. It all depends on what happens with the Peavy deal I guess.
• Remember those 2 kids from the Hoop Dreams movie? They lived in Chicago and still do. It's interesting to see what they are up to these days. Let's just say they aren't playing professional basketball.
• Barack discusses the college football playoff program he is proposing on 60 minutes last night.
• The Bulls win their last game before the circus trip on Saturday night. And Sam Smith might like Derrick Rose more than I do, if that's possible.

Arenas Tattoo Photo

On Monday we reported on the new tattoo that Gilbert Arenas is sporting. Well now there's photo proof:

Even though Gilbert didn't support Barack just a month ago, its all good. I mean its not like there isn't room on the Barack bandwagon and we all jumped on (except noted change-hater Real Stadiums Have Roofs). A tattoo's a little over the top though, don't you think? Why not a button?

I Want A Stupid-Looking Tattoo In a Very Visible Place

In the tradition of Eddy Curry, Mike Tyson, Stephon Marbury, and countless other athletes, Gilbert Arenas has decided to get a ridiculous tattoo. The funniest thing about this Obama tattoo is how fickle he was in his support of democracy in general, let alone a presidential candidate:

Arenas shortened Obama's campaign slogan, "Change We Can Believe In," choosing not to add ink to his thumb. Arenas has "change" written on the outside of his index finger; "we" on the inside of his middle finger; "believe" on the inside of his ring finger; and "in" on the inside of his pinky and "44" on the outside of his pinky. In case you didn't already know, Obama will be the 44th POTUS.

Arenas said he went down to Miami to have his favorite tattoo artist stitch him up after the Wizards arrived in Orlando late Friday night. He didn't explain how he got there -- Miami is an hour flight or three-hour drive from Orlando -- and I was too shocked by the tattoo to ask a follow-up question. All that I could say was, "You've got a lot of free time, don't you?"

For a player who said he wasn't even going to vote just three weeks ago, Arenas changed his apolitical stance quickly -- and dramatically. Arenas said on Saturday that his previous comments about not voting because he was afraid of having higher taxes were "a joke that nobody got." He added that he always planned on voting for Obama but was waiting to find the right reasons.

Read the rest of that article if you want to hear about the mural he painted of Obama's family on an entire wall of his house . Anyways, in honor of this stupid tattoo, here's a little recap of my favorite retarded tattoos:


Vince Young: How dumb is this guy? Remember when he went on 60 minutes and talked about his new tattoo? Yeah it's his name on his back. In case he forgets maybe? We all know this suicidal weirdo didn't score too well on that Wonderlic test.


Eddy Curry: Tattooed "Misunderstood" on the base of his neck. I hate this guy. And on your neck? Seriously? Neck and face tattoos are the worst.


Mike Tyson: He had an upcoming fight with some other boxer and he decided he "didn't like the way his face looked". So he got this swirling crazy tattoo, assuring his "fans" that it wasn't even halfway done. I'm not sure if he finished it, but I don't care. How great is it not having to hear about this guy anymore? Please stay out of the headlines.


Stephon Marbury: Yup, that little star tattoo on his head is an advertisement for his shoes, the Starburys. I wonder how much it would cost to advertise something on the other side of his head?

Murder, Marry or F@#$? What Do You Think Agent Zero?

Our favorite quote machine Gilbert Arenas is back for more. This installment comes from a recent interview he had with Slam Online. I'm not sure who wrote the questions, but I love the answers:

SLAM: Murder, Marry and F*ck. I give you three people and you have to pick one for each.
Gil: Oh, I’ve seen that on 30 Rock. Okay.
SLAM: Alright. Oprah Winfrey, Whoopi Goldberg and Star Jones. What do you do?
Gil: I’d marry Oprah of course…
SLAM: For the money?
Gil: Yeah. She’s also the cutest one out of those three. I’d f*ck….Whoopi and I’d murder Star Jones cause she has a Rottweiler’s head on a Doberman Pinscher’s body.
SLAM: She does look like a deflated parade float.
Gil: Big bobblehead.
SLAM: Alright. Sarah Palin, Hillary Clinton and Michelle Obama?
Gil: That’s rough. I’d marry Obama….
SLAM: Why is that?
Gil: Cause if she got him this far in the Presidential race, I know she can do wonders for me!
SLAM: I hear that.
Gil: And uh…..I’d f*ck Palin…and who was the other one, Bush?
SLAM: Clinton. Hillary Clinton.
Gil: Yeah, and I’d marry Hillary. I mean I’d kill Hillary. She just looks conniving.
SLAM: Yes! Thank you.
Gil: She’d have you assassinated at any minute. She’s just ready to get in there and push the button.
SLAM: Speaking of politics, it looks like you’ve been replaced on the Obama/Arenas ticket by Joe Biden. How do you feel about that?
Gil: With who?
SLAM: Joe Biden.
Gil: Joe Budden?
SLAM: Joe Biden.
Gil: That’s the problem, I don’t even know who he is.

I would say that's Joe Biden's biggest problem-that Gilbert Arenas doesn't know who he is. Great interview. It is packed with great quotes, this was just the section I laughed the hardest on. (The Palin/Obama/Hillary question was an easy one, would anyone have chosen otherwise?)

Sports Nicknames For $1,000 Alex....

This was a $1,000 question on Jeopardy last night. Apparently no one got the answer right. What are they teaching those Yalies these days anyways? Doesn't it feel like Gilbert Arenas's feelings would be hurt if he heard no one got the right answer?

Today's Links

• See you later Scott Eyre. You had your ups and downs but all in all it was a good run. Maybe they should have designated Howry instead.
• I love when Arenas blogs. He is a normal person like you and me, for instance, how often do you wonder "How many sharks should I put in my shark tank?"
• Cubs pummel 'Stros. A few quick notes: Howry sucks, thank god Woody is back, and boy can this team hit.
• Now Favre wants to be a Bear? This has to stop.
• No, No, No. I hope my comments about the Bears O-line didn't jinx them. Down goes Metcalf.
• Wow. Swisher puts the Sox back in the mix with one HUGE swing. Will I ever get to bed at a reasonable hour again?