Random Mocking of Irrelevant Athletes

So, the fact that Candace Parker and Shelden Williams are expecting a child got me thinking a little. I've heard it said that Shelden looks a little like an alien at times, and with the freakish size and athletic ability, perhaps a good idea of their offspring would be....or as Gavin thinks, maybe Marshawn Lynch?


Wow, he is scary. I don't really see the predator thing that much, but whatever, I can beat that. During the college football bowl season, we have seen a lot of camera shots in the stands featuring families and significant others of the players and coaches. There have been a couple worthwhile efforts from the networks, such as Chase Daniel's girlfriend and obviously Colt McCoy's.

All of this fluff coverage reminded me of a few years back when Ohio State and Notre Dame were getting ready to square off and you couldn't turn on a television without seeing Brady Quinn's sister, who was dating OSU linebacker and the object of Brent Musenburger's obsession, A.J. Hawk. Some found her attractive, others like myself thought she had an equine quality.

Quinn and Hawk would later marry (the girl, not Brady) and so I decided to play a little Conan O'Brien and figure out what a child might look like, should the Hawks choose to have one. Well, here we go.