Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Your Obligatory Jay Mariotti Hate Content

Everyone has probably heard by now that Jay Mariotti, recently fired from the Sun-Times, has a new gig at AOL. This guy is a stuck-up douchebag who says whatever he can to get attention, even if it causes grief for other people, or is just plain stupid. Well he got right back to work, but before he could start bashing other people (inaccurately for the most part), he had to clear the air a little bit:
To wit: A week into the Olympics, I was inside The Water Cube That Phelps Built when a voice-mail popped in. It was from the sports editor of the ailing Chicago Sun-Times, asking me to accommodate the newspaper's Paleozoic-era deadlines by doing something the readers wouldn't appreciate. He wanted me to write one column that had Michael Phelps winning that day's race and another column that had him losing. Both would be filed long before the event, which, in some quarters, would be considered an editorial directive to cook up fiction.
I would insert blanks for the finishing times, which a copy editor would fill in, and the bulk would be a lot of jibber-jabber that worked regardless of the result. The editors would decide which column ran based on the outcome. In other words, processed lunch meat for your 50 cents -- and it wasn't the first time. I usually just dealt with these hideous requests. This time, I balked.
Oh my god! I'm so sorry Jay. I've been wrong about you all along. According to your side of the story (which I'm sure is completely true), you are actually a hero! Standing up for good reporting everywhere! Just kidding. What a tool. Does anyone believe this tripe? And even if you do, we all know there was more going on over at the Times than just you being treated badly. I don't think Ebert's famous letter came from nowhere.

Anyways, this idiot goes on and on in his column. Feel free to read it if you want. I could barely get through his nonsense. The part I like best is that AOL is allowing comments on his stories. I'm sure it won't last long, but in the meantime, here's some great ones:

walshjf3 06:42:07 AM Jan 06 2009:
Jay, I was soooo glad you left Chicago. The only time I missed you was when I put the newspaper on the bottom of my birdcage ( it wasn't near as satisfying as it was with your column in the drop zone). I'll have to get my sports elsewhere now. You are a little man with little ideas.

bjngnnss 11:09:42 AM Jan 05 2009
And - who wants to bet to see how long it takes before the ability to comment on Moron's articles gets disabled "due to bandwidth", which is code to hurting his feelings?

monkeewrangler 01:14:30 PM Jan 05 2009
your a gas bag sellout and that dying newspaper made you

petejayhawk 12:11:30 PM Jan 05 2009
Combining the irrelevance of Jay Mariotti with the irrelevance of America Online was a logical step for both parties. Regards,Pete Gaines

gamechump 01:04:20 PM Jan 05 2009
No one like you, Jay.And I wish you would die.But in a really funny way, like being raped with a pineapple.

flexcavana44 09:56:35 AM Jan 06 2009
Dear Jay,Eat shit and die.Signed,Everyone

Ok, I had to stop myself there, I was getting a little carried away. Those comments are golden though. I think I'm going to stay home today and just read them. What's unfortunate about all this is that the people that hate him, which includes a lot of people, are the ones actually keeping him relevant. I'm as guilty as the next guy. I just can't stop hating him enough to ignore him. Go to hell Mariotti (I was flexcavana44 by the way).

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