The NBA: Where John Paxson Being A Retarded GM Happens

This little satire of the Where Amazing Happens commercials was made for the Bulls over a year ago. I posted it a few months ago, but it still holds true to this day. As the deadline approaches, we'll see if we can add "Where Not Getting Amare Happens" to the list. Don't watch this if you a) like John Paxson; or b) being reminded of how shitty he has been pisses you off.

What Do You Think Guitar Hero Was Thinking When They Hired A Rapist, A Steroid User, A Pothead, and A Skater To Promote Their Game?

You are looking at the Dream Team of advertising. From left to right: a pothead, some guy in a helmet, a rapist, and a steroid-user. (Thanks to Jeff for pointing out this hilarious "coincidence").

NBA League Officials Get Bored, Review Every Play of LeBron's Triple-Double

Remember the other day when Kobe dropped 61 at the Garden and set the record and everyone was like "That was f#$%ing awesome?" And then a few nights later LeBron came to New York and was like "I don't care about that, I just want to win," but everyone knew that was bullshit. Then he went and recorded a triple-double and it was like "Wow, LeBron and Kobe are awesome, who's better?" And the whole thing was just really sweet and fun for everyone? Yeah well forget everything past Kobe's 61.

The league has decided to review the game and ruled that one of the rebounds should have been credited to Ben Wallace inside the minute mark in the 4th quarter. (Thanks to Mikey for the tip)



I know, it clearly was Ben Wallace's rebound, but are they serious? Do they have nothing better to do then review whether a rebound is credited to one person or another? Why can't basketball just be fun. Lets hear from the Sternbot:

Sternbot (in robot voice): Basketball is a game of rules, we must adhere to them for the integrity of the game.

Ok I made that quote up, but seriously, why couldn't they just leave well enough alone?

Kobe Bryant Will Tear Off Your Head And Devour Your Soul...Just Kidding, But 61 Points at The Garden Ain't Bad

Kobe Bryant is no Jordan, but in case you didn't hear about it, he dropped a nasty 61 points on the Knicks last night. Curious about the stat line? Well here it is:

61 pts...19/31 fgs...20/20 fts...3/6 3fgs...0 rebs (odd?)...3 assts...1 blk.

Based on his shot chart, it looks like he scored from pretty much every spot on the court.

That point total eclipses MJ's record 55 points by an opposing player at the Garden. It also passes the all-time high by any player in the Garden set by Bernard King (60 pts). The most stunning statistic in my opinion is 20/20 from the free throw line. Talk about efficient. You think he can pick up the slack while Bynum is out? Seems like it.

Today's Links

• Simeon Rice is contemplating a comeback. Could the Bears be his destination? Would that be a good thing?
• The Cubs trade Wuertz and Rich Hill; Hendry says they are ready to go to camp, but will keep options open. Neat.
• Detroit is still a little sore over Matt Millen, and it showed on Sunday.
• So did your Super Bowl party suck? At least you didn't get peed on like Matt Cassel.
• Some Super Bowl viewers in Arizona were subjected to a little porn during the Super Bowl. After some of those commercials, it was the least they could do.
• Michael Phelps is sorry for smoking pot. Well, he is really sorry for getting caught, but whatever. Who cares.
• Kobe drops 61 points on the Knicks. However, if you adjust for Knicks inflation, it's only like 33.

Ankle Insurance? Sign Andre Miller Up!

This Kobe Bryant commercial for his new shoes is hilarious. I bet Andre Miller wishes he had some after he got humiliated by D-Rose.

Today's Links

• What the hell is a scatback? Apparently Garret Wolfe is.
• A St. Louis paper talks about how Jim Edmonds was made for Chicago.
• Cubs get hammered. What happened to Z? Though it was still fun to watch him mash the ball at the plate.
• Kobe says he would take 50 million to play a year in Europe. Awesome, so would I, and Lebron, and D-Wade, but I haven't actually heard anyone offer these players that much money, so why is this still a story?
• Kevin Jones is cleared to play, let the RB position battle begin. Forte v. Jones Round 1.
• Sox lose, but the story is losing Contreras for the year. Yikes.

Today's Links

• I know the story of the Sox game was the fight, but since when does A.J. have white hair? He looks like even more of an idiot. Oh and by the way, look in the left column of this blog and say adios to first place Sox fans.
  
• Cuban wants Cubs, but will baseball want him? $1.3 billion dollars is a lot of money.
• Jr. Griffey is the man. He doesn't take shit from anyone. Just kidding, he's a pansy and he apologized.
• Erin Andrews responds to the accusations about her being too sexy. I love this whole storyline and will continue to link it as long as it continues to be a "story".
• This site is really cool. It has every baseball teams baseball contracts with their players and details of the contract. The Cubs and Sox ones are very interesting.
• "Coach Mike Krzyzewski, when asked why he benched Kidd, was in the middle of answering during his postgame interview when Kobe Bryant interrupted with a two-word explanation: 'He's old.'" Love when ESPN reports this stuff.
• Skip Caray dies at 68. I feel like he was a part of the Chicago Sports family. Sad, sad day.

Kobe, Tell Me How My A#$ Tastes

Every year Michael Jordan hosts a basketball camp for kids at UC- Santa Barbara. He lets them watch him shoot, practice 1-on-1 moves against random people and there is even a question and answer session. This year he got a question that was pretty newsworthy. Here is how it went down.

Child: Who would win if you and Kobe played 1-on-1?
MJ: Kobe would win cause I am older. But in my prime? Not even close.
Child:ahhhhhhhhh
MJ:Let's just say I have a better chance at stopping him than he would at stopping me.



"Sometimes I dream, that he is me..."



Love to see that His Airness hasn't lost that
swagger or cockiness. He then proceeds to shoot
free-throws with his eyes closed.

You can watch the video here: MJ 45 years young