Thursday, October 9, 2008

Murder, Marry or F@#$? What Do You Think Agent Zero?

Our favorite quote machine Gilbert Arenas is back for more. This installment comes from a recent interview he had with Slam Online. I'm not sure who wrote the questions, but I love the answers:
SLAM: Murder, Marry and F*ck. I give you three people and you have to pick one for each.
Gil: Oh, I’ve seen that on 30 Rock. Okay.
SLAM: Alright. Oprah Winfrey, Whoopi Goldberg and Star Jones. What do you do?
Gil: I’d marry Oprah of course…
SLAM: For the money?
Gil: Yeah. She’s also the cutest one out of those three. I’d f*ck….Whoopi and I’d murder Star Jones cause she has a Rottweiler’s head on a Doberman Pinscher’s body.
SLAM: She does look like a deflated parade float.
Gil: Big bobblehead.
SLAM: Alright. Sarah Palin, Hillary Clinton and Michelle Obama?
Gil: That’s rough. I’d marry Obama….
SLAM: Why is that?
Gil: Cause if she got him this far in the Presidential race, I know she can do wonders for me!
I hear that.
Gil: And uh…..I’d f*ck Palin…and who was the other one, Bush?
SLAM: Clinton. Hillary Clinton.
Gil: Yeah, and I’d marry Hillary. I mean I’d kill Hillary. She just looks conniving.
SLAM: Yes! Thank you.
Gil: She’d have you assassinated at any minute. She’s just ready to get in there and push the button.
SLAM: Speaking of politics, it looks like you’ve been replaced on the Obama/Arenas ticket by Joe Biden. How do you feel about that?
Gil: With who?
SLAM: Joe Biden.
Gil: Joe Budden?
SLAM: Joe Biden.
Gil: That’s the problem, I don’t even know who he is.
I would say that's Joe Biden's biggest problem-that Gilbert Arenas doesn't know who he is. Great interview. It is packed with great quotes, this was just the section I laughed the hardest on. (The Palin/Obama/Hillary question was an easy one, would anyone have chosen otherwise?)


hank said...

For the fuck portion: does that include Cleveland Steamers, Monroe Transfers, New Jersey Meat-hooks, Dirty Sanchezes, Bobsleds, or Houdinis? If so, my personal preferance changes.

Rob said...

Big shout to Joe Budden

Ryne Nelson said...

Myles Brown, the story's author, wrote the questions. I'm glad you liked the interview!

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