"We da people of Illinois are sick and tired of scumbag politicians who think dat it's their job to lie, cheat and steal. No more! We deserve somebody in charge who we can trust. Somebody who we can depend on. Somebody who we know
understands the difference between right and wrong and won't be afraid to kick corruption in the ass harder than da '85 Bears beat down da Patriots in da Super Bowl! Dat's right, my friends. Da man for da job is Coach Ditka. So let's make it happen! Ditka for Governor!!"
I like it. I bet those idiots in the Illinois House don't talk back to him, that's for sure. Otherwise they might get a Ditka sized foot in their ass. Oh and if anyone wants to buy me the "Ditka for Governor" hoodie I will be eternally grateful.